Does is ever feel as if there is a rule book for life that everyone else got, but we never received? After an awkward conversation or embarrassing incident, we can often blame ourselves. We think that everyone else would have handled that way better, way smoother, or way cooler. If you've ever felt like something's a little off, or you're "too much" for the world, you're not alone.
If you've ever been at a gathering, feeling like you're the one who's always a beat behind in conversations or blush at the drop of a hat, you're not alone. We worry about saying the wrong thing or making someone uncomfortable. This can leave us feeling less than. Let's unpack why highly sensitive women sometimes feel a tad socially awkward and, more importantly, why it's perfectly okay!
Fun Fact: People aren't thinking about you as much as you think
When I was dealing with social anxiety, my therapist put this in perspective for me. She explained that most people are too busy worrying about themselves to pay attention to what I am doing. If I am so wrapped up in my thoughts, perhaps they are wrapped up in their thoughts, too.
What does this have to do with feeling like there is something wrong with me? Well, even if you do make a social faux pas, chances are no one noticed. People are judging our every move, only we are. No one else thinks there is something wrong with us!
We're Masters of Overthinking
Overthinking should be our national sport because, boy, are we good at it! Highly sensitive women have a tendency to analyze conversations long after they've ended. We pick apart every word, gesture, and facial expression. It's like we're playing detective in a never-ending game of Clue. This overthinking can make us second-guess ourselves and wonder if we said or did something "wrong." But, in reality, most people aren't scrutinizing us as closely as we think. Overthinking is just part of our vivid inner world.
Comparisonitis: The Silent Assassin
Oh, the dreaded comparison game. In the age of social media, it's easy to scroll through Instagram and wonder why everyone else's life seems so "together" while we're over here trying to find matching socks. Highly sensitive women often fall into the comparison trap, thinking they should be more like the seemingly unflappable people on their screens. But guess what? Everyone has their own struggles, and nobody's life is as perfect as it appears online. The important this is to remind yourself of this......often....like every time you are on social media.
Emotions on Overdrive
Feelings – we've got lots of them! Highly sensitive women tend to experience emotions intensely. Sometimes, that emotional rollercoaster can make us wonder if there's something wrong with us. We question why we cry at commercials, feel deep empathy for strangers, or get seriously affected by a sad song. But in truth, our rich emotional landscape is a gift. It allows us to connect with people on a profound level and bring empathy and kindness to the world. Yay kindness!
Embracing Our Awkwardness
The truth is, being socially awkward or slightly inept at times is entirely human. Highly sensitive women often feel awkward because they're tuned into the subtleties of social interactions. Instead of being overly critical of yourself, embrace your quirky moments as opportunities to learn and grow. After all, growth happens outside our comfort zones.
You Don't Need to Apologize for Yourself
A quick reminder for you: You don't need to apologize for being a little (or a lot) awkward. Embrace your quirks, your unique view of the world, and the fabulous messiness that makes you, well, you. Awkwardness is just another shade in the colorful palette of life. It's a part of what makes you you, and it's absolutely nothing to say sorry for. So rock that awkwardness with pride, and remember, it's what sets you apart and makes you awesome.
Your Awkward is Someone Else's Adorable
So, if you occasionally feel like a social butterfly stuck in a spider's web, remember this: everyone feels that way from time to time. Everyone has some degree of awkwardness. Your unique view of the world is something to be celebrated, not hidden away. Social interactions are all about connecting with others, and let me just say, your authenticity is like a ray of sunshine in a world filled with surface-level conversations and superficial chit-chat.
Don't be afraid to laugh at your social stumbles and embrace your quirks. Remember, HSPs make up at least 20% of the population so you're not alone in your awkward moments, and you're definitely not alone in celebrating the fabulous, unique, and socially-inept wonder that is you.